


From here to eternity.

by skyblue993



Series: Jonnor oneshots [69]
Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: Canon Universe, Connor is a Good Friend, Jude's parents are dead, M/M, Oneshot, Pining, also proposes to Jude at 13ro, but it's just details
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-30 17:43:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12658347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyblue993/pseuds/skyblue993
Summary: "I.. I lost them! I don't have a family anymore.""You still have Callie and.. and you still have me." Connor tells him, making shushing noises against his temple, fighting the urge to press his lips against the flushed skin. "I'll always be your family."





	From here to eternity.

**Author's Note:**

> Hola everyone.

It's already dark outside when Connor finally manages to find him sitting on a ball of hay in the family barn. Connor slows down on his steps as soon as he lays his eyes on him, his heart clenching at the empty, lifeless shadow flashing across Jude's eyes and all over his features. He wonders for a brief moment if he should just leave him alone. A part of him feels like an intruder, another part of him just wants to reach out for him and pull him into his arms, being barely able to imagine what kind of thoughts are flooding his mind and how he's dealing with the excruciating pain that comes with the realization that his parents were buried today. It was _official_. Jude Jacob was never going to have his parents with him anymore. They'll never see him grow. He'll never get to tell them about the boy he's just recently discovered he has feelings for. They won't see him getting ready for prom or never get to walk him down the aisle.

He takes a deep intake of breath at the thought, his legs buckling under his weight as he steps forward, finally, letting Jude acknowledge his presence.

  
"Hey, buddy.." He almost slaps himself the moment he utters those words. _Jesus, Connor._ He thinks _"Hey buddy?”_ This kid lost his parents. So much for being sensitive. He wouldn't blame Jude if he decides to kick him out instantly. Instead, Jude stares at him for a painfully long moment, his breath hitching just slightly. Then, he breathes out in a voice that doesn't quite sound like his.

"Hi, Connor."

Connor has probably never felt this unease around Jude. He wonders if he should just leave, fearing to make things worse. If there's even a worse than losing your parents, he realizes. He decides to follow his instinct and jumps on the ball of hay next to Jude. They sit like that for 10 solid minutes before Connor realizes that their shoulders are touching. He feels his cheeks flushing red at the realization hitting him when his eyes flicker down to their hands, watching how close their pinkies are to one another. He almost caves into the temptation to wrap it around Jude's when Jude finally breaks the silence.

"It's late. You should go home.. " He sucks in a deep breath, biting away the words that desperately want to follow.

"They'll understand." Connor breathes out a deep sigh, his heart aching in his chest as he utters out through a shaky breath, " _This_ is more important."

"I.. I could hide in here all night."

"You don't have to hide." Connor insists, tone determinate. "and if you do, I'll hide in here with you for as long as it takes."

Jude lets out a hollow laugh, finally looking at him. The look on his face is so sharp that Connor's cheeks heat up, his gaze flickering down to the ground, refusing to stare back.

"What if I decide to never come out?"

Jude knows Connor's answer by heart even before it actually leaves his mouth, "I guess I'll learn to feed myself with hay or something." He trails on a slight chuckle, looking back at Jude's face. Still So dangerously close to his own. "I heard it's good for the heart."

"It's actually not." Jude chuckles. The sound is music to Connor's ears. "But thank you for making me laugh."

"You are welcome." Connor tells him, his hands trembling as they itch, more than they should, to reach for Jude's.

There's another comforting silence hovering above them after that exchange and Connor's more than okay to just sit there with Jude, and make sure that he's, _well_ , not okay, of course, he won't, not now at least, but _surviving_. There's a sense of comfort in the fact that Connor's helping. That, at least, he's the only one that Jude hasn't kicked out of his personal space so far. Unlike he's done with Callie.

Then, like a bolt from the blue, Jude's shoulders suddenly start trembling.

  
"They.. t-they were my family." Jude's voice cracks on a sob. Connor doesn't hesitate before grabbing his hand, his other arm wrapping around his shoulders. _Close._ He needs to have him _close_. Jude lets him. He listens in complete silence, leaving Jude to cry and scream and sob against his chest.

"I.. I lost them! I don't have a family anymore."

"You still have Callie and.. and you still have me." Connor tells him, making shushing noises against his temple, fighting the urge to press his lips against the flushed skin. "I'll always be your family."

"Y-you are my best friend." Jude corrects him letting out a hiccup against Connor's shirt, his hand desperately gripping Connor's until it hurts. Still, Connor doesn't dare to let go. "W-what if w-we go on separate ways and.. and-"

Jude can't even say it out loud. He can't accept a possible scenario where Connor won't be a constant presence in his life.

"I can't lose you too, Connor. I.. please, don't leave me. W-whatever happens, p-please don't leave me too."

"Jude, hey. Look at me."

Jude does look up, his red-rimmed eyes meeting Connor's very teary own. Connor's breath hitches, his heart beating so erratically in his chest that hurts. Damn. Hurts so much.

"Marry me."

Connor should have expected the hysteric laugh roaring from Jude, the _"Are you crazy?"_ Look written all over his face. Still, it hurts deep.

"W-what?"

Connor's face flushes crimson, his breath stuttering as he says, "Not now. I wasn't- I wasn't suggesting to get married now b-but maybe.. in 10 years-"

"Connor, we are thirteen."

Connor rolls his eyes, his hand trembling in Jude's hold. Neither of them let go. "Okay.. in 15 years _then."_

Jude lets out a wet laugh, his head resting against Connor's chest as his eyelids heavily flutter close, his breath getting shallow.

"I know it's soon to talk about this and believe me, I'm fully aware that it will probably not make sense at all but.. but I w-want to be your family and the only way to do that is through marriage so I thought... let's do this?" Connor continues, knowing that part of what he's saying doesn't even have sense since, 1) he'll never replace Jude's parents and 2) does he really know for sure that nothing will ever tear them apart? He still keeps talking though, because Jude's smiling and Jude smiling is, hands down, his favorite version of Jude.

Connor's ready to hear Jude say something along the _"You have completely lost your mind."_ Lines, but Jude surprises him by murmuring against his chest to _tell him more._

 


End file.
